OMG! it's a new blog...WCW Handheld 12-27-1991!

At this rate, the blog might be updated three times a year...we'll see how that pans out. Luckily, no one reads this, so it's all good.

However, if you stumbled on this and thought "I love random pro rasslin' reviews, but I'm not gonna read this if its only updated twice a year", allow me to explain the delay. I moved to Texas in July, before that, I worked two jobs to afford said move. So, outside of the occasional episode of RAW or SD or ECW, I had no time to watch wrestling. Now that the move is done though, and I'm still job hunting, there is plenty of free time at my disposal. So let's fire up the DVD player and pop in some WCW handheld goodness!

Ah, 1991 WCW. In wake of Flair's June depature, WCW was seiged upon by a motely cast of gimmick heavy super workers: from Van Hamer, PN News, Black Blood, to Big Josh and Oz, it was a thrilling time to be a fan of World Championship Wrestling. The York Foundation was in full swing, leading to a fun series of matches on any of the 65 various WCW TV shows featuring Buddy Landell, Terrence Taylor, Richard Morton, Tom Zenk, Bobby Eaton, Thomas Rich, and Dustin Rhodes. Lex Luger was champion of planet Earth and having his problems with Ron Simmons, Rick Steiner, and anyone else they could find until Sting was free to win the belt. Steve Austin had just arrived on the scene and had taken the TV title as his own, and Cactus Jack was making his second, and highest profile, stint to date, toughening up the Stinger before the eventual showdown with Flexy Lexy. Oh yeah, and there was an ill fated Light Heavyweight title, which was an excuse to put Morton and Johnny B. Badd in sub par matches with Mike Graham. However, on this show, I've heard, two guys named Flyin Brian and Jushin Liger are wrestling for it...I wonder if that's any good?

Let's begin:

Match One: Terrence Taylor vs PN News

Joy! Taylor is simi-frsh off joining the York Foundation, and News is fresh off his fifteen consecutive job to Steve Austin on WCW Saturday Night, so this should be a bg time batle to see who can crack into the WCW Top 10. Of course, as with most handheld videos, slight blurry and shakiness are an issue, so bear with me if play by play is an issue. After some stalling, News begins the match with an arm bar heavy offensive flurry, causing Terrence to bail to the outside. Back in...both...stand ther, before News locked on a grizzly like headlock. A knockdown off the ropes, and another headlock. As a side note, some time in 1991 WCW brought in Axl Rotten to fued with News, punk vs rap! It was also spossed to be a battle of the big splashes, though Axl was never fat enough for it work well...and he also didn't stay in the company for more than one or two TV tapings. Anyway, News misses a charge and Taylor goes right to work. Choking against the ropes and a series of punches which rocks the big man. I don't know how he's doing it without the computer out there telling him what to do! A slam attempt is stopped, and PN shows him how it's done. Three slams and I'm hving Muhammed Hassan flashbacks. Taylor off the ropes, drockkick by the Rap Master! The Broken Record Splash Misses...and Taylor hits the FIVE ARM, causing the fan who taped this to MARK OUT. Taylor has this well in hand but almost loses it off a PN schoolboy. Something happens which the camera misses....we'll just say it was a powerbomb by Taylor! News gets in control again and hits a Bundy like avalanche for the WIN?! That's it? Alright, decent but short little match, we'll have to go

0 for 1

Match 2: Dallas Page vs Jimmy Jam Garvin: There's at least some interesting continunity with Page being the Freebird's manager during the early and middle part of 1991. But this is also his first six months as an in ring performer. Jimmy starts off quick with a sunset flip and a clothesline, but then slows it way down with an arm bar. Dallas takes control off a clothesline, following it up with some basic punches, elbows and eblow drops. Russian leg sweep and rope choking, topped off by an over the top neck snap. At least it's well paced. Page misses his own Avalanche, obviously watching the previous bout, and Garvin begins a firey comeback. Off the ropes, Garvin leapfrongs and nails....a five arm? Seriously, he jumped up like Taylor and nailed an awkward fore arm shot for the win. That was odd, no DDT...no anything!

0 for 2

Match 3: Larry Zbyszko vs Tom Zenk: This has a fifteen minute time limit, so I don't expect any contact until minute nine. Zenk has this awesome theme that contains the lyrics "Yeah yeah yeah yeah YEAH yeah yeahhhh....". It goes well with his "debuting heel squash victim" gimmick. Aside from being invovled a little with the York Foundation/Dustin and friends storyline, Zenk did little after his 1990 TV title run. After some basic stuff inside, Larry actually picks up the pace and destroys Tom's knee on the side. Back in, he kicks away and snaps the lg around. This is insanely fast for Larry. Z-Man gets a sleeper out of no where, I think this was his finisher at some point. That doesn't last long, as Larry gets a standing rope assisted leg lock. More leg attacking, which I guess means no missle dropkick tonight. A few seconds later, Zenk gets a roll up out of no where for the feel good win! Not enough here, though oddly, more than I expected from Zbyszko.

0 for 3

Match 4: Cactus Jack/Abdullah the Butcher vs El Gigante/Van Hammer: Cactus and Hammer were in the middle of a fun little fued. Cactus starts with Gigante, and Mick isn't having the best time. Clotheslines and a bearhug, until Abdullah comes in, and now it's a battle of the big men! Abby runs into a boot and Gigante actually bear hugs him, lifting him off the ground. A claw on Abby, and then a double claw on Cactus as well. I've never longed for Van Hammer as much as I do now. Van Hammer in, and Abby tags Cactus. The fight is on! Hammer goofs up almost instantly, and Cactus nails a bulldog and the Cactus Clothesline over the top! This gives Abby time to beat on Hammer, cause it was the hip thing to do in 1991. This would be funnier if they were getting the heat on Gigante. Abdullah could just stab him with the fork over and over, no one would mind. Right now it's just a series of Abby chops until Hammer makes the comeback with a slam and a leg drop in his Hogan Imitator spot. He doesn't tag out because he's an idiot. Back and forth punches now on Cactus, then another slam and leg drop. Gigante comes in because he can't believe his parter is such a moron. As he's being pushed back this corner. Hammer goes for the slingshot suplex on Cactus, Abby nails him with their head on a stick thing, and Cactus gets the win. Van Hammer is a fool.

0 for 4

Match 5: Rick Rude vs Sting: Alright, things are going to get much better. Sting comes in and, not surprisingly, kicks Rudes ass with punches and a DDT. The crowd has woken up big time. Huge press slam and Sting throws Rude over the top, then takes him into the steel railing. I so miss the steel railing. Rude gets throw into the time keepers table, and Sting overturns it, stomps, and this is about as hardcore as he got when Cactus wasn't around. Back in, Rude pulls the knees up on a Stinger splash, and Sting bumps huge for a clothesline. Back breaker and it's heat time! Rude, btw, was US champion at this point, winning the belt off Sting after Sting was attacked by a mystery man during long Cactus/Abby/Luger fued. Chinlock by Rude. Long chinlock. Sting eventually powers out, but gets kneed again coming down for a splash. Rude throws him to the outside allowing Paul E to get a shot in. I don't know how I forgot, but this was, of course, during the height of the Dangerous Alliance! How I mentioned the York Foundation twice and not the Alliance, I'll never know. Rude locks on a bearhug. Sting reverses into his own bearhug, then an eyerake, but can't slam rude! Selling! Big suplex by the Ravshing One, and it looks all but over. Little Stingers are crying all throughout the arena. Sting comes back with punches and his goofy chops but gets caught in a sleeper. Rude wears him down onto the mat, the ref check the arm, and it's over! Sting is out...just kidding, he starts to make another come back. This time with two atomic drops, allowing Rick to do his fun selling. Clotheslines aplenty and a huge press up into the lights. Rude bumps into the ref as Sting locks on the deathlock, but there's no ref! Sting takes care of Paul he and knocks Rude out with the cell phone. Another ref slides in and counts the pin...another ref...aww, we know where this is going, mass confusion and Rude nails Sting with the US Title. I think Sting won via DQ, either for the ref bump or the belt shot. Either way, good times!

1 for 5

Match 6: Richard Morton vs Johnny B. Badd: Richard Morton is, of course, decked out in his heel of attire of faded blue tights and chaps, his hair looking exactly like it did five years ago. This heel turn was as affective as Tatanka. And neither of them saw fit to change their gear that much either, there's an obvious correlation. Not much early on. Punches are missed. Lots of walking around, until Morton hits a huge hip toss. Badd with a hip toss and arm drag, Morton hits an atomic drop, and Johnny is the least firey face ever (he was coming off turing against Teddy Long). Richard controls on the outside, which isn't to say he does anything. Back in and still nothing, a suplex. For a guy who spent most of his time getting worked over by heels, Ricky sure didn't pick up much on how to do it. Punches and a choke. Badd misses a charge. A
Badd inside cradle gets two, which upsets me, cause I'm ready to move on from this. This is obviously not the right role for Ricky Morton. You know, yesterday I found a handheld which has Ricky Morton vs Tully Blanchard on it. I'm sure its ten times better than this. Also has Gibson vs Arn Anderson, I need to review it soon. Badd comes back for a moment with a powerslam, then hits the top rope sunset flip for the win. Dull as dirt

1 for 6

Match 7: "Stunning" Steve Austin vs Scott Steiner: This is more like it. Scott was just coming back from a torn tricep, and, seeing as Rick was in a little side fued with Luger, we get a rare singles match from Scotty. Very exciting. Scotty had earlier in the year wrestled Flair in a great one on one match, which I think was the first time they wanted to push him solo until Rick begged Scott not to let them. Scott backs Austin ito the corner because he is super strong. Scott takes him to the mat early, because he's also a better mat technician. Side headlock by Austin. These days, you'd watch these two men for the promos...this was a different time. Austin throws Scotty outside, but gets caught coming off the apron. Austin nails him on the way back in and fires away with punches. Military press by Scott and a huge clothesline. Austin goes back to the headlock but gets caught in a headscissors. Austin takes control for a moment, but Scotty drives him with a tilt a whirl slam, causing Stunning Steve to bail. Scott follows him and slams him and slams him on the outside Back in and Scott does lifts Austin into the powerbomb position and does the Rick Steiner ram him stomach first to the corner. Steiner charges and Austin ducks low and sends him over the top, then comes off the apron with an ax handle smash. Some choking against the guard rail. Austin continues to work over the arm in ring. Not much to type during this part. Scott makes a comback with a knee lift, but gets taken down and arm barred again. These two would not have a singles match on TV against each other until late 1992, when Scott would win the TV title just seconds before leaving for WWF. It was an odd little moment, which I only vaguely remember and should rewatch Saturday Nights from that period to freshen up. Barry Windham and Austin then fued over it a little I think, having a good 2 out of 3 falls match. Anyway, Austin's heavily in control right now, kicking away at the arm, until Scotty just says "screw this" and throws him back hard with a German Suplex. To the outside, Scott slams him into the railing and then onto the timekeepers table, tipping it over much like in the last match. Austin runs back into the ring. Backbreaker by Scotty, and a double underhook powerbomb. Belly to belly suplex for two...and its a time limit draw! Aw geez Pretty good, though the heat segment was a little long, especially if they were only going 15.

2 for 7

Match Eight: Jushin "Thunder" Liger vs Brian Pillman: I think Liger won the Light Heavyweight title on Christmas Night, so this would be two nights later. Liger in control early after some flipply arm bar counters. Brian comes back with a headscissors out of the corner and a victory roll. Drop toe hold and arm bar by Pillman. Liger with a headlock, off the ropes, and he connects with an enzuguir. Pillman dumps Liger onto the apron, but gets knocked down and liger comes back in over the top with a splash for two, then slows down for some leg work. Ah yes, both men trying to ground the other the game of human chess! Headscissors and hip toss by Pillman, than a dropkick and arm drag into a bar on the arm! Sure nice to see some moves placed in between holds. Liger with a back drop and a spin wheel kick to send Brian outside. That's followed by a baseball slide dropkick, and a plancha fakeout, and another baseball slide. They're teasing the dive! Build the highspot, that's exciting. I'd been so used to spottier matches, I totally expected Liger to go flying outside there, they sure fooled me. Liger with a chinlock now, and a minute later they do the goofy both men trying for arm drags double Matrix arm drag thingie, which Brian wins and follows up on with a short arm scissors. Stand hammerlock by Brian, which gets reversed, and then he runs Liger to the outside. Brian holds the ropes, but Liger pulls himo ut and throws him into the guard rail, solidifying himself as a heel! The table is used again, this time meeting Pillman's head, and evil foreign heel Liger tosses Brian back in and kills him with a flipping senton. Up top for a monsault, which only gets two. He slams Brian again and climbs up, crushing him with a top rope summersault senton, that's just mean! It only gets two. Knucklelock bridge spot, into a Pillman monkey flip but Liger catches him with a powerslam for a good two count. Jushin slows it down with a headscissors, but Brian catches him going for another moonsualt and dropkicks him to the floor. Pillman does his own baseball slide dropkick and decides to just crack Liger across the back a chair. Liger backdrops out of a piledriver attempt and hits a huge Asai Moonsault, coming up just an inch short. It still looked great. He tries to suplex Pillman back in, but settles for wheel kicking him down to the floor again. Linger goes for a dive but Brian jumps up on the apron and nails the Air Pillman clothesline, then pulls Liger back to the apron, steps onto it, and suplexes him outside, getting the move he wanted two minutes ago. Brian throws him back in and climbs up top, and both men try dropkicks. Liger misses a spin wheel kick, but Pillman's connects for two. Awesome near falls here. Pillman sends him off the ropes, ducks too early and Liger nails a powerbomb for another two. Tombstone atempt by Liger, but Brian reverses it but gets only two. Mid air collision and both men are down, this is fantastic. Not sure how it stacks up with the Superbrawl 2 match, I need to watch that again, and not the clipped to hell Turner Home Video version. Minutes later, both men on top and Brian blocks a superplex attempt, throwing Liger off, he goes for a cross body, with the champ rolls through for the win! I'm pretty sure this was a defense by Liger, as in the title change match, there's a plancha, it was shown in clips on TBS. But I'll double check. Anyway, great match, awesome pacing, they built up the high flying stuff and actually built to simple moves (the baseball slides, the apron suplex). Just a blast to watch.

3 for 8

Match 9: Arn Anderson/Bobby Eaton vs Ricky Streamboat/Dustin Rhodes: This house show has taken a turn for the better. Dustin and Steamboat had been teaming since The Dragon returned to WCW. Arn Anderson and Larry Zbyszko were tag team champions then, and barely able to hold onto the belts in the wake of the rise of Bill Kazmier before eventually losing to Steamboat and Rhodes. Anyway, this is a number of months removed from that, all the heels are in the Dangerous Alliance, and Paul E. has teamed up Anderson and Eaton, becuase he's brilliant. Arn starts with Ricky and I wonder if these two ever had a singles match against each other on TV. All I remember is tag matches. The faces control early, as to be expected. After little success, Eaton comes in and they fight over a top wristlock, Eaton takes over with his badass swinging neckbreaker, a move that has, sadly been lost to the ages, partly in thanks to Marcus Alexander Bagwell's piss poor version of it. Dustin in, and Eaton gives him the great right to the face. Arn comes back in, continuing a fued with Rhodes that would go on for the better part of Dustin's run in WCW. Arn cuts Dustin up top, goes for a superplex, but for some reason,gives a thumbs up, takes to long, gets dumped off and Dustindoes a great top rope lariet. Arn bails out, Ricky nails a chop off the apron, goes crazy with a chair and Dustin elbows both heels inside the ring...it kinda breaks down until Arn and Dustin are back in the ring, the two legal men. That was a very nice break in form, I was totally expecting a long Dustin in perial. Ah there we go, Dustin does his trademark cross body and crashes to the mat, rolling otside where Eatin is free to go to work. Medusa, btw, is with the Tag Champs, sporting some sort of ship captians outfit left over from the Bruise Cruise. In an odd moment, Steamboat comes over to the heels side to stop the double and triple teaming, but just ends up getting slammed on the floor. This, however, does no lead to Dustin attempting a tag and finding no partner, Ricky just sells and eventually gets back to the corner while The Natural gets his ass kicked. Odd...Arn nails a DDT off a Dustin irish whip, but Dustin gets a kick out. It was like an anit-babyface comeback. Dustin is needing some kinda Hulk-Up spot, like the Tatanka war dance or the Warrior seizure. He tries to punch his way out of the corner, but Arn makes the awesome tag off a Dustin atomic drop, and the heels run wild some more. The story hereis that Eaton an Arm are easily the better team, accented by every time Ricky goes to help Dustin but actually ends up getting more beat up. He attempts a second time but Eaton drives his head into a ringside chair. It's interesting, and I would hope it effects Ricky's ability to fight even if Dustin makes the hot tag. The experience of the DA team is really showing here. Dustin gets the Eaton neckbreaker here, and, if Bobby was a face, it'd be Alabama Jam time...but he's not, so Dustin just gets a knee to the face. He finally makes the hot tag and Steamboat goes nuts with those illegal karate blows! He does a double chop to the head of both men. Eaton and Ricky end up inside as Arn sends Dustin into the pole. Steamboat gets a roll up on Eaton for the win. Rhodes and Steamboat win, retaining the belts, but you do get the feeling on any given night, they could lose them, just because they didn't jell as much as Paul E's team. Oh yeah, and the Dangerous Alliance beat them down afterward. Great match!

4 for 9

Match 10: Lex Luger vs Rick Steiner: Gary Michael Capetta threatens me by saying this is match has a one hour time limit. They should run through their power spots like at the Superbrawl 1 Steiners vs Sting/Luger match and then go to the finish. This mini-fued, as mentioned earlier, is the result of Scott taking the summer off for a torn tricep. Rick got a pin in a non-match against Luger, and the guys holding the camera chant that they want Flair. Three seconds in, Luger tosses Rick so Mr. Hughes can beat on him some, setting up the Steiners vs Hughes/Vader during the first part of 1992. Rick takes over on the inside with a back drop and some punches, and a german. Not much heat, which is a combination of 1. Rick not realistically having a chance of being made champion and 2. It's a house show, so title changes are less likely than usual. Luger stalls on the outside, because his 1991 heel character, until the 1989 version, is based around being boring. Luger was also slowly getting depushed, while still champion mind you, due to his contract being up in a few months, and the Dagerous Alliance kicking ass all over WCW. Punches and clotheslines back and forth, very slowly,Luger dumps Rick outside again, so this time Harley Race can get a shot in. It might have been Race the first time, now that I think about it. Luger takes Rick into the guard rail. Every move Lex does is highlighted by him walking around in a circle pointlessly after it. Bak in with an elbow drop, not the sky high never hits elbow, just a regular one. They seemed to skip the whole opening face control portion of the match. Maybe its because most of Rick's offense needs to be saved for the comeback. Rick sells and ax handle by slumping his shoulders and punching Luger in the face, but Lex cuts him of with a clothesline and sets up for the piledriver. However, he lifts Rick about two inches up to high, jumps bakc on his ass and plants Steiner to the mat with the worlds most half ass piledriver powerbomb thingie. Rick makes a comeback and I don't notice it because the crowd isn't buying it. They spill outside, Rick goes at Lex with a chair, misses and Luger tries to run to the dressing room. Rick brings him back and begs off. Well, I'm sure he's seen it enough from Flair. Rick slams him and nails the top rope bulldog, for two...probably because Harley was late getting in the ring to break the count. Race trips Rick, who goes outside after him, leading Luger to sneak around and nail Steiner from the back. Harley goes for a piledriver and takes a backdrop outside, and it seems like they're running through seven different match finishes. Rick tries to get back inside the ring, Leg grabs his legs and holds him out, as ring is grabbing the freaking ropes, until it's a double count out! WOW, that was shitty, Scott runs in to stop Luger and Race from double teaming Rick and that's it. That didn't work at all. Why in the world they had to protect Rick Steiner, when he's going back with Scott for tag teaming soon anyway, I dont know, but it made Luger look like a tool who couldn't even win after hittng his sloppy ass pile driver.

4 for 10

Final Thoughts: The highs here are great (Liger/Pillman and Rhodes/Steamboat vs The Dangerous Alliance) and the lows aren't so bad, and at least kept short. The main event is a mess which helped make Lex look like less of a might champion, leading to his anti-climactic match with Sting at Superbrawl 2. Anyway, the middle portion of the show is entertaining, the opener is alright. I had a good time. Thanks for reading!